Day 17

Pretty good day yesterday surprisingly. I forgot that i would be playing pool with matt yesterday so i ended up smoking at 2p and it definitely didnt help the study process after i got home but i managed it. I will see what happens today with the no weed experiment. 

The folks i follow on youtube to help stay sober both emphasize the importance of not being as hard on yourself as you usually are. I was really hard on myself about how tuesday went. When i was talking about it to matt he literally just said, “hey man, you are getting sober, its ok to have a day and just relax. You cant keep going 100% all the time, so good for you, im glad you had a day of that.”. He did go on to say that if i was doing that multiple times a week he would be saying something different. Either way, that was a really nice thing for him to say, and he said it at the right time. It was nice.  

My skin is starting to heal now, each day is starting to feel like a continuation of the last, rather than just not being sure what i did the day before, making each day just something to get through. Almost like i would start over every day, rather than build on what i did the day before. Hence why i wasnt making any progress in any area while drinking all day. 

Stop eating sweets to replace the dopamine high from the booz. Easy fix here, just be smarter than your own brain. Easy peasy. 

Either way, i will stay sober today.